Sade Sundays: Auditory Diaries from Neptune – Volume 53

I’ve considered uninstalling our doorbell after Mike exploited it upon his arrival. When the upstairs neighbor was kind enough to let him in (I imagine he rang both apts. A & B simultaneously), he sprinted past her up the stairwell and then past me into my apartment where I followed closely. Straight to the refrigerator for a beer, to the cutting board for a lime. As he tilted the bottle ceilingward, its contents roaring down his parched gullet, I carefully wrapped the knife he used to cut the lime in cardboard; inexplicably, he had somehow managed to break it while [...]

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