In near total darkness, Coachwhips appeared magically not on the stage but on the dance floor near the exit. Singing through a blowpop and without a PA they managed to have better sound than anyone on the actual stage. Although Austin’s Amplified Heat unofficially closed the evening, The Coachwhips certainly were the grand finale for my beer-soaked weekend. Sunday night at the Lobot Gallery, what could be sweeter? With cheap Tecate and Beam, it was truly the weekend that wouldn’t die, and John Dwyer is officially my hero.

I hadn’t seen The Coachwhips before and I may never be the same. Hopefully there will be more opportunities. If not, we are surely blessed to have plenty more of Thee Oh Sees. See them often. Follow them religiously like a Deadhead, but smarter and cooler. Looks likely they will play a xmas xtravaganza at the thankfully exhumed Eagle Tavern. Stay tuned.

I arrived just as Portland’s Guantanamo Baywatch were tuning up. Dressed as dalmatians, Chevelle sported a collar with tag that read “Rover Cleveland;” the drummer was “Malcolm Rex.” Fueled by Jagermeister (their new drink of choice, ironically they fight far less under it’s influence), they delivered the furious surf slop I need now more than ever. The vocals were nowhere near loud enough, but I could care less. While all the rest of you are following Thee Oh Sees, I will follow Guantanamo Baywatch. I may even give Jagermeister another chance.

Unable to resist, I followed them out to their van. Surely the sweetest band in showbiz. We spoke of sibling relationships, dancing naked to the new Cum Stain record, and the challenges men face urinating in skirts.

Coincidence?! The art on the walls spelled out T-R-A-S-H in grotesque naked characters. What other festival can you say that about?

LA’s Fidlar came on next. Young, frantic, catchy punk ditties with zero LA bullshit! Refreshing!

The LA invasion continued with Pangea. Check out their big hit “Too Drunk to Cum,” from the 2011 Burger Records release Living Dummy. Except for the halo of cameras on the singer, it became hard to tell where the band ended and the crowd began. They play the Rickshaw on November 9th. Do it.

Apologies to band number 1, Chicago’s red-headed duo White Mystery, and the aforementioned Amplified Heat. It was a long weekend.